Post #201

Rockers!

Welcome to Post #201! What is it? A VFW?

Nope!

Wow, I just looked. The Doghouse is 200 posts strong as of this writing! Thanks for reading.
It confirms popular suspicion - I talk a lot.

So, I feel extra-compelled to say something of substance today. Something that is useful, pertinent, and profound.

I got to entertain the cub scouts! That was pretty fun. I even signed a few autographs. I drove by their camp today to drop off some business cards, and one of 'em said "hey, that's the rockstar!"

OK, all joking aside, here's a cool lesson:

I'm a subscriber to EQ magazine. Nope, it's not a fashion for horses (Equine Quarterly.) It's a recording magazine, and it's pretty cool. They're always hollering about mic placement.

The principle is this - not only does it matter what mic you use to record, it matters where it is in the room in relation to the amp. Dead center in front of the speaker cone, touching the grille cloth is the norm. But you can get "room" in the sound by putting it a few feet back, tone down the highs by placing it off-axis of the speaker, add sparkle by putting it in a bucket in the back of a '57 pickup, etc etc. (Just kidding about the last one, but that being said, doing crazy stuff will yield nifty sounds.)

One thing that guitarists often fail to realize is that this applies to live playing as well. For those of us who either a.) aren't blessed to have a ten-foot tall wall of amps, or b.) are snobbish like me, and spend way too much on vintage sounding combos, the amp is usually trying to chew our ankles off.

The amp's on the floor, good people.

Physics will tell us that sound waves will refract (bend) around objects smaller than the wavelength. This can explain why the bass guitar, with it's very long wavelength of the low frequency, will find it's way everywhere in the room. But the guitar, with a higher frequency, has a tendency to be easily blocked.

This, in turn, creates a "beaming" effect from our amps. If you're right in front of it, you'll have to locate your ears - they'll be blasted off. But stand up, and you'll just hear a dull roar.

For starters, get that amp off the ground. If you're playing a gig with a combo amp, try putting it on a chair. Better yet, get an amp stand that tilts the unit back. You'll be able to hear things way better, and so will the crowd.

My good buddy and recording guru Mike has told me many times to listen directly in front of the speaker to hear your tone. Every time I record, I'm taken aback by the harshness of the sound. While it's in part the mics and preamps I'm using, it's also that I'm used to listening from a different perspective. So listen to in at the source!

If the opposite is the problem, and management isn't happy with the earsplitting highs that your JCM six billion mega stack is throwing off - turn the amp so it's facing the wall.

If your bass cab in your home studio is lacking in oomph, put the sucker in the corner. Corners amplify low frequencies, and can be a real headache for acoustic engineers. But for us fellas looking to make cheap speakers sound kickin', give it a shot!

The point is, folks, is experiment, and see what new sounds ya get. I guess you could almost say it's like the ancient practice of Feng Shui - The Chinese Art of Placement. (Sorta like a cosmic interior design - put the picture of Hendrix over the door to ensure the spirit of Rock is always welcome.)

Rock on!

- Josh

Andrea Stolpe is DA MAN!

Well, metaphorically speaking, that is.


Rockers! I hope y'all had a fantastic Fourth of July! For readers not in America, this is a holiday celebrating the independence from British rule. We stick it to the man each year with a patriotic display of Chinese-Made fireworks. These fireworks are music to China's ears, as it's the sound of exploding debt exploding a bit more.

The 5th of July, much less widely celebrated, marks the anniversary of the first draft. I believe there was some grumbling, and the precursor of the modern yo-yo was walked across the tea crates floating in the Boston harbor. Or something like that.

But anyways, I hope it was good for ya, and you got some time to catch up on some reading!

You NEED to Check out Andrea Stolpe's book Popular Lyric Writing - 10 Steps to Effective Storytelling. It rocks!

I've been reading it, and it's helping my songwriting already - and I'm not even done with the book! "Sure, Josh!" you may say..."Finish the book, bro, and then tell us!" Dude, when I'm done reading this worthy tome, I'm gonna be at the top of the charts, and I will have long forgotten about...anyway, I'm just kind of excited about it.

She outlines a great way to get ideas - it's called Destination Writing where you spill out yo' guts on paper (or screen), and then go back to rearrange those thoughts into a song.

Here's something I jotted down today.

Theme: Sunday evening

With a sigh, I signal for 210 south, and reluctantly step on the gas. Echoes of laughter mingle with the muffled roar of the exhaust, and are whisked away to the side of the highway, where they probably still linger, waif-like. I wonder if the ghosts of yesterdays all know each other. If they had a ghost party, I could almost picture it...Brightly dressed sprites of the fall excursions chatting effervescently with the tall spirits in Christmas sweaters, while quite a few dreary wallflowers lurk in the dismal shadows of unmet challenge.

Huh...I am a poetic fool of a guy. Now I gotta make a song out of this! (There's more to this, too.)

Rock on! And try this cool way of writing - you'll like it! And be sure to check out Andrea's website!

- Josh

The Application of Knowledge

Rockers!

What up, bros! (And sisters!)

Here's a riddle for ya:

What renders a Josh wordless, viewless, and makes him sit down for a while?

Trying to write a song!

It's absurd. Here I sit, in my teaching studio, surrounded by a bunch of gear, teaching forty-odd people a week. I can shred. I play gigs. I'll expound on tritone substitution, or the history behind Stevie Ray Vaughan's music.

But write a song that's good? Huh!

Ever since embarking on my solo career, I've been schooled again and again at how much there is to learn. But that's not a bad thing.

Singing - Recording - Microphones - Software - Drum machines - and now, grammar and rhyme schemes.

Did not see that coming. So much to learn. Dangerously easy to lose sight of the goal - application.

The point of all this, folks, is this:

Regardless of your art or craft, spend a little time working on the application of your knowledge.

For musicians, I would enthusiastically say to write songs, in addition to practicing your sweep picking and razzle dazzle arpeggios.

Finishing is the key word here. Finish a song.

How 'bout you poets and potters out there? Well, while I'm a borderline poet with lyrics, and will write a poem once in a great while, I'm not very familiar with the artform. But let's speak hypothetically for a minute...Maybe you're a reclusive writer, and have never polished one of your poems to the perfection that you feel it's worth of. Perhaps writing a poem that you'd share at an open mic would be a fantastic start. Finish it!

Potters! I have no clue. I honestly don't. But I love pottery!

Painters - stop copying the masters for a minute, and create your own painting. To paraphrase J-Dog, "The kingdom of artistic validity is now."

I think it's a blessing and a curse that musicians spend so much time practicing. But remember, without applications, we just become practitioners.

Rock on!
- Josh

Big Tony

Rockers!

Boy oh boy, I'd say I'm the luckiest guy in the world. However, one of my clients has already claimed that distinction, so I'll settle for second.

Does anyone remember the blog I wrote called Paint the White House Black ?
I featured a video of a band called Trouble Funk - a band who pioneered the DC music phenomenon called Go Go - and are still going strong today!

I'm a fan of these guys. They're pretty darn cool!

So, I got a new client the other day. She's pretty cool. I asked her what kinda music she wanted to learn. "Rock and Funk." I went on a ramble about how I love those two types of music, and I've played in a go go band, yadda yadda yadda.

She said "Oh, you like Trouble Funk?" YeAh, I said. "My Dad's the bass player for 'em. You know, Big Tony!"

I almost fell off my chair. She got him on the phone for me. "Hi, err...Tony!" I said.

She told me she would ask him by.

So he stopped by my studio the other day, and tried out a bass. We jammed on "Don't Touch That Stereo." It made my day.

It was way cool! Thanks, Amoni and Tony! (Geeze, I'm sorry I cut you out of the picture, Amoni!)

The Making of an EP - Breakfast or Else..!

Hey hey!

OK, so what's the deal with the EP I'm supposed to be recording? Namely, where is it? Well, it's still floating around in the air somewhere. I'm workin' on the writing.

But yesterday, I ran out of oatmeal. So, I went to the store. It struck me that I'm acting like a classic Urban, and dragging my feet wayyy too much. I also decided that the music I'm writing doesn't fit my personality. This first came to my attention when I told a client that the music I write is mellow. He just laughed in my face. That highlighted the disconnect between Diamond-Dave people interactions and Debbie Downer lyrics.

And I was still out breakfast.

So I got my oatmeal (gotta have that stuff), and decided to write something fun. The first thought was about how people wait their lives away.

"Wait a second!" I said to myself. "THAT'S not fun!"

So I wrote about how I need my breakfast, or I go bonkers. It's still presented in a semi-serious acoustic blues format, but it's partly a joke, too. It's mainly a joke because I recorded it in four takes, and with one mic. I usually do ten million takes, and spend days getting my sound. But hey man, I gotta start posting songs sometime!

I'm using an old Harmony acoustic guitar that a buddy just gave me. It's falling apart, and the strings are about three feet above the fretboard. But it's great for slide guitar!

Check it out! Listen to "Breakfast or Else" on my myspace page.

Rock on!

- Josh

My first stadium gig

Rockers!

Wow oh wow! What a weekend! Friday I played my first stadium gig. Saturday I weedwhacked using a premium Husqvarna weed eater that my brothers gave me. Sunday I had the first of many ribbon cutting ceremonies on a piece of property I bought. (Commonly known as a house.)

But the stadium! OK, OK, I wasn't headlining or anything. It wasn't even a rock show. But it was for a darn good cause. I got to play two songs for a Relay for Life event in a minor league ball park. (Technically professional league.) It was sooo much fun. There were an estimated two to three thousand people there, most of 'em walkin' around celebrating their survival. And so was I.

Nonetheless, I DID get to step up to the mic, say "What's up, Waldorf?! Are you ready to ROCK?!" And congratulate 'em on a job well done.

Lesson learned. It's way more fun to play in front of a stadium than a dive bar. So keep on practicing, good people! It's highly worth it. And I was basically background music. It was still a blast! I can't wait to headline a show! You know - the chanting of "Josh Josh Josh Josh!"
I had so much fun. Thanks to Ashley and Amy for making it possible! AND of course to Jason and Charlie, two dedicated clients doubling as roadies!

Here's a picture from my soundcheck:



Rock ON!

- Josh

No room for that

Readers! Rockers! Followers!

Hey, have you been over to my twitter page, and added me to your list?

www.twitter.com/dontjoshme

I'm gonna let my imagination get the best of me. Don't miss it!

And speaking of letting imaginations get the best of you...That brings us to today's topic: Victims. Not ones of war, fraud, or violence.

Ones of their own making. Ones who embrace weakness as a way of life. I come from a line of 'em. My family reunion should be a refugee camp, there's so many sorry bleeding heart weaklings in it. "Oh, I'm hurt." Baloney.

And that has really put a bee in my bonnet. The world is filled with musicians, and people, who refuse to take responsibility for their circumstances. And today, I put my foot down, and refuse to continue that legacy.

Regardless of who's fault it is that you don't have a record deal - find a way to get one!

No matter if you can't sing - learn! (Talkin' to myself, there.)

Playing too slow? www.metronomeonline.com is open 24/7

We're all here for you, man. But you gotta be here, too.

So - quit waffling! Make it happen!

Rock on!

- Josh