Ask

Hey Comrades!

August is here. I'm always glad to see it. I say "Hello August! Only a month till you're dead!"

Yeah, I'm not a big fan on the summer.

I'll tell you what I AM a fan of, though! Inspiration!

Of course, there's a story...

I got a call today. "Hey Josh, it's ___" (We'll call him Sam.)

"SAM! Dude, are you like ten feet tall? Your voice is so deep!" Sam is a former guitar student of mine, and he was calling to set up a visit. I hadn't seen him or his cousin, ___ (we'll call him Joe), also a former student, for probably about three years.

We sat around my teaching studio and talked for a good while. These fellas are 17 and 18, and about to set foot out into the big ol' world. It was super fun to toss around ideas about the future. It was neat for me to remember being 18. Seven years, while trivial with almost any metric, do put one in a very different phase of life. I always enjoy seeing old students. It's an honor that they stop by, financially un-obligated with any cancellation notice or anything, just to say hello.

The subject of ideal careers came up. Ever itching to put on my motivational speaking hat, I eagerly told Sam and Joe about my "Ask" theory. This is something I'm sure I've blogged about before, but I'd like to repeat it.

When we first get an inkling of what we really like in life, we excitedly tell the world. To quote "Little Stevie Vai" from his subtly profound track The Audience is Listening, "When I grow up, I'm gonna be a famous rock 'n roll guitar player!"

And just like the song, people laugh at the cute little kid at first. But then when it's apparent that the person is serious about pursuing their dream, they're beaten down. I've had many people tell me "Seriously, how many people make it? You'd better find a fall back."

We quickly learn to conceal the dream, because it hurts to be scoffed at.

There it rests, like the memory of a dear departed friend. Sadly, just like memories, it fades with neglect. One day, on our way to that dusty room where we've locked it away, we realize that, not only have we misplaced the key, but that we don't even remember what exactly it was that we locked up.

"Ah, it must have been to be a music manager!" we think. Now, that is an exciting and dynamic career, so to all you managers, don't think I'm knocking your craft. I'm not.

But, remember we started out wanting to be famous rock 'n roll guitar players? We've become so good at concealing the dream from other people, that we've hidden it from ourselves.

So we drift, and we know we're missing the target. Frustration sets in, and we might think "why can't I be the best at _____? It's not like I'm asking to be a rock star or anything!" Livingston Taylor once wrote "It hurts just as much to fall from a small dream as a big one."

Honesty with ourselves is vital. We need to find our way to that room, unlock the door, and look clearly at the dream. Maybe we've outgrown it, and then we can thank it, and place it respectfully back on the shelf. But maybe it's what we're really after. And, in the silence of that room, we can say to ourselves "This is what I really want to do with my life." Nobody has to hear you, and you never have to tell anyone.

But if you aren't clear about what exactly it is that you want, it's much harder to get. Ask. And ask for what you really want.

Now, sometimes one dream may morph into another. A young man named Johnny played guitar once, and moved with his band to LA. They flopped. Broke up. Done. Someone told him to come read for a movie. He got the part. You might have heard of him. His last name is Depp.

So, you're not always going to get what you ask for. But don't keep that dream locked away in the dust. It misses you.

- Josh