Monday, August 22, 2011

Fame is unrelated to Talent - just ask Kim

"What's wrong with you, man?" my mom asks, her eyes flashing. "Where did I go wrong?"

Parental disapproval isn't something that I usually deal with. For the past 25 years, my folks have done an exceptional job of showing me that I counted, mattered, and was something to be proud of.

However, I have brothers. Their favorite pastime is to sort of play emotional billiards, and try to create a bus to throw me under, with mom driving it. Come to think of it, they must have learned it from me. And trust me, it's great fun...When you're not the one in front of the bus, that is!

Zakk really outdid himself this time. He connected the dots, and explained to mom that it was "THAT Kim" I always talk about when a picture of the "Keeping up with the Kardashians" showed up on Netflix. You should have seen him cackling as I got flattened.

I admit it, there must be something not quite right with my taste in women...Fairly wrong, you could say. But from this, we get a great music lesson. Read on!

It's a beautiful day ouside, but my heart is black. Kim is finally married. Now I'm gonna have to wait a whole three years before she's back on the market.


Maybe I can learn to dress myself properly in the meantime. I sorta look like the caddie from "Happy Gilmore." The first one. The kid. Actually, a combination of the two. It must be my haircut and unshaven face, or perhaps it's the checkered shirt and checkered shorts that match even worse than my socks. Yep, I need to up my game if I wanna go fishing, that's fo' sho'.

But wait, who is this questionable character that I speak of, and how does she stay so famous?

THIS brings us to the point of today's blog.

It is definitively proven now: Commercial success and talent have nothing to do with each other. Sure, they can be combined, but they're completely different things.

I can hear you all howling that Justin Bieber has proved this point even after countless other pop stars have, but here's the thing: There are some little girls who genuinely like his music, and are moved by it. So while I don't care for it, it's a matter of taste. While the Revolution may overthrow it, it's still some form of music.

But here's a reality TV star who, as far as I can tell, has absolutely no talent, and who's fame is self perpetuating. I'm not saying it's bad - to the contrary, it's rather amazing how well it works. It's like an engine, almost. Once started, it will run indefinitely. She's like the opposite of one of those brilliant musicians who can't even dress themselves, but will draw a crowd of thousands when propped up onstage...Aerosmith! Ha ha, I'm a fan, quit yelling!

I can't applaud her, because fame for fame's sake is completely pointless, and borders on a disrespectful waste of oxygen in a suffocating world.

From a marketing standpoint, however, it is unbelievable! Did you hear she made 18 million dollars on her wedding? That's the way to have a wedding - heck with spending money!

While the Revolution will overthrow all frivolity and designer brands, perhaps we can take a page out of that exclusive book, and realize this:

Talent does not equal commercial success.

Commercial success is a skill.

Practice that skill. And practice your talent.

For Hendrix's sake, please make the world a better place. Make sure that music counts!

Now, I'm off to practice tying my shoes . I've only got three years till it's game time again.

Geeze, what if she reads this blog?

- Josh
PS. Google spellchecker suggests that "Kardashian" be changed to "Balderdash." Interesting.

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